Thunderstorms

So, I'm writing again. I know, I know... so soon?
Well, yes actually. I've been inspired by a movie: Aloha. Yes, a Romantic Comedy. Sue me, lol. My "dad" is a lawyer, so good luck! ;)
Anyways. I've been hearing what I think is thunder the whole time I've been watching this movie. I'm AFRAID of thunder and I KNOW it's an irrational fear, but I can not seem to help it. I developed this fear around 15 years old. Idk how or why, I just remember liking them and then fearing them. So, this is a new fear. The thing is, I really want a thunderstorm to happen. I want to drive around in torrential rains and get lost. I want to explore the things I haven't yet explored. I want to travel, become a Queen to some man who actually loves me. 
I want to be loved and make someone so happy that he can not stand it. I want to make him feel like I am the reason he is alive. I want to love him and be loved by him. I want to show the world how magical the planet we live on is. No, there aren't witches and wizards like LOTR or Harry Potter, and mermaids are still a fantastical story to talk about, and no I haven't found a unicorn... 
This world is magical in a whole other way. The way sunlight sparkles against concrete, the way raindrops fall and rebound, the way children can look you in the eye and change your life forever. There is so much to see, so much to feel. Mountains are amazing to climb up and view everything. The way the rabbits hop along, how the deer hide and show themselves every once in a while, how the bears are obviously there. 
It's all something to see, even if you've seen it, there is always something new. For every death there is a life that is added to the world. It's like reading a book over and over again, there is always something that you missed no matter how observant you are. One of my favorite things about this world is: music. I love hearing a new song for the first time, in fact if you have a song you think I might like, share it with me. I love music. Music unlocks the soul, expresses our inner thoughts and feelings, and it's a magic that certain people have an amazing talent for!
Stars are magical, the ocean is magical, storms are magical. The most devastating storms are very magical, in the fact they bring different life together. Muslims, Mormons, Jews, Germans, Latinos... they all get together when a storm devastates another group of people. There are donations, people helping, etc. It's a sign of human compassion, humane treatment, and love. 
Even people can cause devastating storms. I was just involved with one, and you know what. I'm tired of existing! I want to LIVE. I want to laugh and have fun! I don't want the drugs, sex, or booze...because that doesn't make you truly happy... I want the adventure. The love. The hope. And my friendships. I cherish all of that and I hope that you, as my readers, do too. 
Thanks for reading my 6am thoughts. Maybe I'll write more later? Haha. I really hope I can help people through this. 

Love, Syl